Bite-sized Family Finance Tips Baked Fresh Daily

As part of our ongoing research at FamZoo, we’re constantly scouring the literature for fresh articles on family finance. We extract the best advice on how to raise kids who are responsible and thoughtful with money.

Now there’s a way to consume the very best tips we find, one manageable bite at a time. It’s called Family Finance Favs. (That’s short for “favorites” and has the long “a” sound like in “hey!”)

January’s tips included:

You Should Teach Your Kids About Money This Way...Or Not

Parents, do you cringe when you hear a sentence beginning with “You should...” coming your way? Someone is about to hit you with their sage advice on how to raise your kids. Oof. No matter how well meaning the intentions, such assertions are inherently presumptuous about your family’s unique situation. Christine Bader wrote a wonderful post about “You Should” encounters today. Stick with stories instead. Tell a mom (or dad) what you did in your situation, not what she should do in her situation. As Christine says:

“Stories are much more powerful than recommendations.”

Let the recipient decide how to apply or adapt your story...or not. Amen. That’s something we can all keep in mind when talking to others about teaching kids good money habits.

So, how should you teach your kids good money habits? I don’t know, but here are some good stories to consider:

Moms on Money and Work

Last year, I shared a couple key things my Mom taught me about personal finances. This year, I’ll share a few lessons my Mom taught me about work while I was growing up:

• All work is noble. My mom always conveyed a deep respect for honest, hard work and enthusiastic appreciation for a job well done. Whether or not the labor was manual made no difference. The pedigree of the laborer was irrelevant. A frequent and indelible image from my childhood was my Mom offering home-baked cookies and refreshments to folks doing work at our house. They were always delivered with a twinkly smile and a heartfelt thank-you. Work is good for the soul and deserves appreciation.
• The details matter. My wife and I will never forget the image of my Mom using a Q-tip to clean the space between the buttons on our kitchen blender when we were first married. It’s a funny little example of her attention to detail, not to mention her ability to select the right tool for the job! Take a little extra time to do the job right. People notice.
• Just do it — now. Growing up, my Mom would often remind us that a stack of clothes by the stair meant take’em up and put’em away. I now believe it was a subtle form of conditioning for a critical broader point: if you see something that needs to be done, take care of it — preferably sooner rather than later. When cooking, she’d always remind us: “if you clean up along the way, you won’t have much work to do at the end.” That’s wise advice that extends well beyond cooking.

What did your mom teach you about good work and money habits?

I’ve embedded a list of Mom-Money-Lesson articles from around the web below (also available here. Vote for your favorites. Seen another good post on the topic? Add it to the list.

My Mom was, and continues to be, a fabulous role model for me. That, among many other reasons, is why I love my Mom.

Happy Mother’s Day!

IRS Free File Program: Perfect For Teens With Summer Jobs

To minimize tax filing hassle and expense, I usually just include the modest income from my kids on our own tax return. But this year, my teen had a nice summer job with a fair amount of withholding. I decided to look into the cheapest, easiest way to file his own tax return, so he could cash in on his refund. As a “starving” college student constantly bumping up against his budget, he could definitely use the extra beer pizza money.

I googled on “file taxes for free” and stumbled upon the IRS Free File Program. It’s a partnership between the government and commercial tax software companies that was created to encourage more Americans to file taxes electronically. Through the partnership, tax prep companies like Intuit offer versions of their online tax filing programs free of charge to eligible filers. The teen with a typical summer or part time job will probably meet the requirements.

I’ve been a user and fan of TurboTax for many years, so I was delighted to see that they participate in the program with the TurboTax Freedom Edition. I was able to breeze through the program in about 15 to 20 minutes and file my son’s federal and state returns to collect his refund. Unfortunately, California does not sponsor a Free File Program, so we were dinged $14.95 for the state filing, but that didn’t dip into his refund too much.

Here’s a step-by-step slideshow:

The bottom line:

$203 Fed Refund + $34 CA Refund - $14.95 Filing Fee = $222.05

Nice windfall. That’s a lot of beer pizza! For my son, it was all pizza from the past though — the full $222.05 went toward paying off the loan I gave him for his Spring break road trip. Easy come, easy go.

How We Saved $788.54 at Disneyland

Hey, what happened to the Family Finance Picks this week?

Well, in a word: Disneyland. The (pre-college) kids all had the week off for Spring vacation and a rare break from the usual Hockey/Lacrosse/Soccer routine, so we decided to take a last minute road-trip to Disneyland. The family finance picks will be back in action next week.

In the meantime I thought I’d share a few quick tips that saved us a bundle on our trip — over $750 off Disney’s advertised Hotel-Park combo package.

• Do a little research. I like reading reviews on TripAdvisor. It’s a great way to find out what to expect amenity and price-wise. Read the most recent reviews to avoid unpleasant surprises — like construction at the Disneyland Hotel.
• Make your own package. Based on our research, we could tell the Disney vacation packages had a bunch of pricey stuff we didn’t care about. So, we dropped the meals (Jamba juices, lunches, and dinners at the Downtown Disney District instead), the character visits (the kids think they’re creepy anyway), and the concierge services (we like self-serve), and we looked for deals on just the individual pieces we wanted — rooms and tickets.
• Call and ask questions. I’m really hooked on the convenience of booking stuff on the web. It’s so nice to avoid waiting on the phone to speak to a human. Click, click, click and you’re done. But I had some questions about the prices I was seeing on the Disney pages, so I decided to call and ask some direct questions. I’m glad I did. I ended up paying 30% less than what I was seeing on the site.
• Check for specials. Disney happened to be running a special promotion on 3-Day Park Hopper Tickets, so we picked those up for quite a bit less than what was quoted over the phone. Check their special offers page. (Right now through May 28, there’s a nice spring special on room rates — unfortunately not available at the time we went.)

We’ve always just done daytime excursions to Disneyland in the past, but this time we wanted to check out the convenience of staying right at the park in one of the Disney hotels and catch the nighttime experience. Since TripAdvisor reviews had some complaints about construction at the venerable Disneyland Hotel, we went with the upscale Grand Californian. (Heck, we don’t take many family vacations, so why not?)

Yes, it was pricey, but I have to say it was completely worth it. We had an absolute blast! Every once in a while, you just have to go for it.

Ode to Troublemakers

As part of an extended family project, I have been helping my Uncle Bob, a (semi) retired reverend, put his sermons on-line. In honor of Martin Luther King day and the inauguration tomorrow, he wrote and delivered one this weekend entitled "Ode to Troublemakers". Wonderful food for thought - check it out.

If you are like me (or not!), I suspect you will enjoy reading his other pieces as well. He has a delightful, casual, witty style - not your usual intimidating sermons. His messages are very accessible and relevant even to folks like me who are not, err, ummm, shall we say "regular" church goers...

Be a Tigger, Not an Eeyore. Watch This.

Here is a great 10 minute inspirational video that is on my must-see list. It is a condensed version of "The Last Lecture" by Randy Pausch. Many of you may have seen or heard about it already. I watched the original hour+ lecture a while back and I highly recommend it. This 10 minute version is a great refresher (when you are feeling in that Eeyore mood from time to time) and hits all the key points. In particular, I think it is a perfect teachable moment opportunity with children. I sat down and watched it with each of mine.

Be a Tigger!

P.S. I stumbled upon this version of the Pausch video while reading this Presentation Zen blog entry by Garr Reynolds. Garr has an excellent blog on preparing and delivering compelling presentations.

Skip-Generation Connections

A recent (Friday, August 18th) letter to the editor in the Wall Street Journal caught my eye. The letter was a reaction to an earlier (August 1st) editorial that characterized America is an "insanely child-centered country". The reaction carefully - and correctly, in my opinion - pointed out the distinction between doting on children and connecting with them. One should not confuse the two. As per the original editorial, we need to be less child-centered when it comes to the doting angle, but, as per the subsequent letter to the editor, we need to be more child-centered when it comes to creating meaningful intergenerational connections. The letter to the editor goes on to cite a plethora of research corroborating the importance of meaningful intergenerational relationships in stemming the onslaught of high risk behavior in kids (substance abuse, violence, anti-social behavior, academic failure, etc.). Makes perfect sense.

This exchange in the Wall Street Journal reminded me of a class of intergenerational relationship that I think is of particular value: the "skip-generation" relationship. The relationship between a grandson and a grandfather is a typical (but by no means the only) example. In my own experience, I have found that even the most subtle and brief skip-generation connections can leave incredibly profound, lasting impressions. Impressions that help reinforce and shape subsequent lifetimes of beliefs and behaviors.

For example, my two grandfathers left very lasting impressions on me, despite the fact that we spent relatively little time together. It would be quite an ambitious project to do sufficient justice to those deep impressions here, so instead of attempting to articulate them in detail, I will just engage in a very brief free-association and share a few photos in hopes that they might convey at least a flavor of what was passed along.

Grandpa Herb (my paternal grandfather): firm handshake, eye contact, the gentle sing-song "hellooOOoooOOooo"; respectful, humble, straightforward, simple, clean, meticulous, practical, athletic; organized toolbox, handy pocketknife, sturdy monogrammed HMD bar glasses, Stanford University.

Grandpa Herb at my wedding in 1984.

"Buddie" (my maternal grandfather): the name says it all, ready chuckle, twinkling eyes, arrowheads, stetson hat, bolo tie, aromatic cigar, the ranch, the land, my mother's beloved "Daddy" (that's her hand on his shoulder below).

Buddie, circa 1954.

My brother, Buddie, and me. One of my all-time favorite photos.

Skip-generation keepsakes - wonderful everyday reminders through which the connections live on.

As parents, I think we have a responsibility to facilitate these connections without trying to artificially shape them - to create the opportunities without trying to guide the outcomes.

I am also convinced that technology can play a positive role in facilitating meaningful everyday skip-generation connections. Email, online photo sharing, streaming audio/video and all kinds of other emerging technologies present intriguing new opportunities to forge meaningful connections and break down traditional barriers of geography and time.

That reminds me, I need to upload those photos of my son's birthday this weekend so the grandparents can check them out. Should spark a conversation or two...